Sunday, March 28, 2010

i'm losing my sanity........

I am ready to scream…. again. Whenever I have my own home, I am making sure that my bathroom is nicely decorated and spacious. Maybe I will get to have the toilet in a room of its own and have the sink and shower in another. I’m talking extra privacy!! All I do is live in the darn bathroom.
I got a phone call from my GI doctor Wednesday telling me to come on to the office. We talked about what I was experiencing. He believed that the flora in my stomach had been flipped, possibly from a dose of an antibiotic for a sinus infection. He told me to continue to work on the liquid diet with the help of some Imodium. I am also taking Bentyl for the cramping. If I am still having trouble keeping my liquids and mashed potatoes in, I am to take a round of Flagyl and give him a call back.
I did however have a meltdown in my cube Friday. I ate ten crackers and I paid. I felt that bad feeling and there came the cramping. I couldn’t handle it. I am tried of going to the freaking bathroom, especially at work!!!!!! If I lose my job, I am blaming my Gastroparesis. I have no energy. I feel as if everything is out of control. I am twenty-two years old for crying out loud. My doctor went to tell me that my immune system is more susceptible to illness; I’m talking ten times more susceptible! I was planning on going back to school this summer to become an EMT. I saw that dream fly out the window. I had previous worked as a licensed pharmacy tech, but that is also out now. I have always kept my license up for a backup plan. If a sinus infection made me sick and required me to take antibiotics, what would the flu or a stomach virus do? I got my hair colored yesterday and it was brought to my attention that my hair is thinner than the last time. Isn’t that fantastic? All I know is I am extremely moody, I can’t keep anything in me, I’m losing weight and I’m exhausted by ten thirty in the morning. My Gastroparesis is beating the fool out of me.


  1. Hi Jennifer--I'm happy to have found your blog through GastroDisastro. I love the quote at the top (did you write it?) If so, could I share it on my blog? I know my readers who are seriously ill would find it inspiring. I would both credit you and share a link to your blog. (

    I can so relate about decorating bathrooms, making them the most beautiful rooms in the house because you have to spend what can feel like most your day there. I also have a bladder condition (I got it when I was your age) that can have me staring way too long at the bathroom walls. I decided then that my bathrooms would always be pretty.

    You are so young to be so ill...having illness blow open career plans is devastating. I hope with the help of your body and your doctors that your GP can get to a manageable place that keeps your work and dreams alive.

    My kids are your age, so I'm old, but new to GP. I had it really bad couldn't eat at all most the time for almost two years. Gall bladder surgery bumped mine up to eating "white" solids and much less unbearable symptoms. Yet GP is an everyday part of my life...and I am finding comfort in finding other GP bloggers (I blog about my systemic condition, but also about GP).

    I just realized that we were diagnosed with GP same month, same year.

    Thank your for blogging about GP Jennifer--connecting with others who "get it" is a great comfort. Sending you "tummy" calming wishes.

  2. Hi Kerry,

    I am sorry I have been slow to respond. It is very nice to meet you. I love your blog! I also deal with bladder issues. Last summer I looked pregnant due to my bladder expanding. My doctors attributed it to the medications and me not going to the bathroom when I needed to. I had to learn how to cath myself and shrink my bladder over time.
    You are a very inspiring person. As for the quote, I did not write the quote. A good friend of mine wrote it. Kimberly has Gastroparesis as well. Her email address is She also has a really informative website about Gastroparesis ( If you don't mind, just shoot her an email about the quote. I don't want to give something away that isn't mine. :)
    I look forward to getting to know you! I hope you are feeling well today and GP free.